Nonbinary activist Alok Vaid-Menon broke down the history of and problems with the gender binary and how people can fight against it in video that has gone viral on social media. So it was summer 2012 in Cape Town, South Africa. I wept: for her, and for me. In 2017 they released their critically-acclaimed poetry collection Femme In Public, a meditation on anti-trans discrimination. And what I gained was my life back. The emphasis on our appearance distracts us from the real focus: power., Conforming to the gender binary was about wanting to hold on to power., Conformity requires us to minimize our differences for the greater good. It depends on each persons experience. All Rights Reserved. not, 'Can you help me help you?'" This writer and performance artist is fighting for a world where all people are able to self-determine their gender. ALOK (they/them) is an internationally acclaimed writer, performer, and public speaker. But I think once I started to experience the delight of freedom, there was no going back. And I can feel it there in the way that I move. At what point does femininity become synonymous with apology? we have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free, Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes you. And I think that I still practice that commitment for better or for worse. An insistence on radiant beauty, despite all of the vapidity and the vehement violence. I used to love dancing, and I think dance was my first language. And I can feel it there in my voice. To use his own words, he once declared, I am not a man. So if its like, oh, Im feeling shame that theres hair on my face, I close my eyes and I breathe in to that. And sometimes you wonder if you caused the fire. Similar motivational celebrity speakers are Shane Ortega, Geena Rocero, Chris Mosier, Angelica Ross and Kylar Broadus. And its just a model for me of what I want the world to bethat. How do I express it? I was paying so much attention to the ways in which I was discriminated against that I forgot to pay attention to the ways in which I was already free. And what does it mean to move from there? Then I convened a group of us at the end of that summer and I recited it to them. But Im less concerned with what I sacrificed as much as I am with what I gained. We are happy to help! Or is this someone else? Gauge interest and check availability for speaking engagements, appearances or corporate events, Provide you with the speaking fee to book Alok Vaid-Menon or other celebrity appearance fees, Give you personal recommendations for the best keynote speakers or celebrities, Assist you with any questions you have throughout the talent booking process, First Transgender Man to Make Team USA, Transgender Advocate, Triathlete & All-American Duathlete, Founder of TransTech Social Enterprises & Actress in the FX Drama "Pose", Attorney, Author & LGBTQ Rights Activist; Motivational Disability Speaker; Founder of the Trans People of Color Coalition, CNN & ESPN Columnist; Celebrated Voice on Sports, Race & Gay Rights, Openly Gay Actor Known for My So Called Life, Thirteen Reasons Why & Star Trek: Discovery, Executive Director of "Equality for HER", Activist & Mental Health Advocate, Transgender & Gender-Nonconforming Activist; Executive Editor of "Out" & Former National Organizer for Transgender Law Center, Transgender Activist; National Face of Transgender Student Rights, Peloton Instructor & Makeup Artist; Founder of SPEAK Instagram Live Series, Tony Award-Winning Actor; Best Known NBC's "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" & "Mr. I dont need you to show up to 'protect' me," Porter wrote on Instagram. Before making any health decisions, you should consult with your doctor. Because before I could speak, I could gesture. And then I ask it until I can remember that the shame was not my own. The gender binary - the maintenance of two separate and opposite genders - is a system of power that exists to create conflict and division. I see peace and serenity and surrender and acceptance of what is. And so then I put this brown body in a pink shirt, and what did that do? Normative beauty is insecure. No need to encapsulate my universes into frameworks of gender. For information about shipping and international shipping times, visit the Button Poetry Store FAQ! AAE is a talent booking agency for paid events only. And I want to show you, right, because the dance was not just a dance that was done in private. In the early 20th century, when women were advocating for the right to vote, men created postcards that showed women dressed up as men and men dressed up as women, Vaid-Menon said. I see interconnectivity with nature, the earth, humanity, and a deep practice of humility. And thats, I think, where the spirituality comes in. I think that when it comes to trans people, the narrative right now is so obsessed with us and a collateral damage of existing and having in the world as a trans person, like, woe are them. . And then practice that. I didnt have shame. Then you cannot tell the difference between their shame and your own between a body and an apology., Some gender non-conforming people are nonbinary, and some are men and women. Im going to act like a fool because it makes me feel good. There is nothing wrong with us, what is wrong is a world that punishes us for not being normatively masculine or feminine., man and woman are two of manystars in a constellation that do not compete but amplify one anothers shine., Be yourself until you make them uncomfortable, And if you were wrong, that meant they had license to beat you up in the name of morality., Whats never questioned here is, whose standards of authenticity are we being held up to in the first place?, And we tell the kids who dont fit into our categories that they are wrong. I dont know if Ill ever be able to account for the grief of it, but I think that what I can do and what I hope to do is to believe that healing is possible. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. Alok Vaid-Menon: The Urgent Need for Compassion. You know, I think that theres a lot of misapprehension, miscomprehension about people like me. We deserve more options. And that dissonance, I think, is the crisis of our times. And so actually I had a relationship with my body that I am still trying to remember, which was, I just moved to communicate. I was raised Hindu, and I associated religion with organized religion, with a set of parameters and protocols and scriptures that had to be followed explicitly. . All American Entertainment Named to Inc. Best Workplaces in 2022. . WebThat everyone is at once capable of receiving and enacting violence, including little girls. I feel like every day is an artistic and spiritual endeavor to be what is. Femme In Public (2017) is a collection of poetry by nonbinary artist Alok Vaid-Menon. Why wouldnt you live in the pulse of the universe? Robot". But color was one of the first realms of resistance I had. poet. Eyes on the Prize: Fashion plays an important role in Mx. Diversity and inclusivity are not just industry buzzwords. Awaken is produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public. Cannot help but smile when your nurse shaves your right thigh for your bandage. Next Thing: This month, Mx. So my organic predisposition was actually one of radical self-acceptance. ALOK is a dynamic and seasoned presenter who excels in tailoring their message to their audience from college students to corporate boardrooms. But what I like about a wedding dance party is everyone is just being gnarly and foolish and playful. The team at All American Entertainment represents and listens to the needs of organizations and corporations seeking to hire keynote speakers, celebrities or entertainers for speaking engagements, personal appearances, product endorsements, or corporate entertainment. In the episode, which premiered Monday, Vaid-Menon said the gender binary the idea that there are only two genders rather than a spectrum and the traditional expectations associated with binary gender labels hurt everyone, not just transgender people, and these fixed ideas of what it means to be a man or a woman make it difficult for people to find out who they truly are. so i want to embrace to this woman on the trainand say: i am afraid too say: remind me trustsay: sometimes this silence feels like the highest pitch of screaming. New video daily http://bit.ly/buttonpoetryIf you loved this poem, check out Andrea Gibson: http://bit.ly/MaybeINeedYouAlok Vaid-Menon, performing in Minneapolis.Button Facebook: http://facebook.com/buttonpoetryButton Twitter: http://twitter.com/buttonpoetryButton Instagram: http://instagram.com/buttonpoetryButton Tumblr: http://buttonpoetry.tumblr.comAbout Button:Button Poetry is committed to developing a coherent and effective system of production, distribution, promotion and fundraising for spoken word and performance poetry.We seek to showcase the power and diversity of voices in our community. The work of soul searching came to me through being an artist. What feminine part of yourself did you have to destroy in order to survive in this world? So who am I going to prioritize? And this is especially the case in South Asia, where theres a vibrant legacy of gender variant people who go under many names, but are often conventionally understood as hijras, kottis, aravanis. Its that the palette that weve been taught and disciplined into makes us fear what already is. A listing or profile on this website does not imply an agency affiliation or endorsement by the talent. In a conversation filled with wisdom, historical insight, and radical mercy, ALOK challenges us to value compassion over comprehension, to try harder for each other in the name of love, and reminds us that learning is a sign of being alive.We want your feedback on season 1. In 2019 ALOK was invited to close the Business of Fashion Voices Conference with a keynote speech calling for the degendering of fashion and beauty industries. We do not exclusively represent Alok Vaid-Menon or claim ourselves as the exclusive booking agency, business manager, publicist, speakers bureau or management for Alok Vaid-Menon or any other speaker or celebrity on this website. And that cant coexist with a project that is more about control than creative self-exploration. I feel beauty right now in being a disembodied voice. All rights reserved. Copyright 2023 Apple Inc. All rights reserved. School, Vaid-Menon explained to me, was difficult, and they needed an outlet. Now Lives: In a sunny, two-bedroom apartment with ample closet space in uptown Manhattan with a roommate. And I wanted so badly back then to be a dancer. Let's figure it out. Alok Vaid-Menon have Our booking agents have successfully helped clients around the world secure talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for both live and virtual events for over 20 years. In her eyes my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself. Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Did anyone teach you about the question words? It was a dance that I wanted to stage for my own community. And what a delight and what a joy it is to be foolish together. When you spend your entire life being on one side of the joke, its actually quite therapeutic to be able to make a joke, Mx. I am awake.. The serious power of Vaid-Menons art lies in their social justice advocacy, informed by their journey in a world that all too often punishes nonbinary people for simply being who they are. P.S. Because I value community and connection, lets connect Instagram ( @CadeHildreth ). Alok Vaid-Menon Finds Beauty Beyond Gender, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/12/04/style/alok-vaid-menon-artist-nonbinary-poet-activist.html. Theres, in fact, a third way. And what most people dont know is that one of the tactics of colonization was the attempted cultural genocide of these populations. The fear is not of what could be, or what was, its the fear of what is. I think theres a reason when I research in my own work the long legacy of gender variant people across the world and many cultures, that we were associated, so often, with medicine people or healers or divine leaders, because we understood that in so many ways, we were preparing the body to receive higher wisdom. What kind of energy do I want to be a part of? For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit AWAKEN Podcast. But before we begin, Alok first shares their thoughts of a sculpture titled The Buddha Triumphing Over Mara. And I think I love movies, but I love being alive more. As a mixed-media artist their work explores themes of trauma, belonging, and the in america!(i understand), the ways we have been taughtto apologize for our sadness.to blame ourselves for the hurt.to erase the violence.to numb the pain.to normalize the death.to wake up in the morning anddeny that sometimes when thetrain crawls into the station thatwe may see a pill in its place. Please select your budget range:(check all that apply), Please select your budget range: And so then color became associated with anti-reason, emotion, unrestraint, unbridled ways of being. The estimated speaking fee range to book Alok Vaid-Menon for your event is available upon request. As a visibly gender non-conforming person, I often receive unsolicited advice about my appearance. And at least for now I say no. Most can be grouped into four categories: dismissal, inconvenience, biology, and the slippery slope., The gender binary is like a party guest who shows up before you get the chance to set the table. Is this me? Because the thing is, you have revelations about yourself, but youre not ready yet to live those revelations. Premium Powerups . The feeling I get in me is that we have been so structured by the logics of cinema that have made us feel like there has to be this kind of transcendental moment of realization. And because I was a quote-unquote boy I was not supposed to be that feminine. Are you willing to go back? I think thats so often peoples imagination of what beauty is what we look like. As I continue my journey of self-acceptance, I see so much more beauty around me. until you make them uncomfortable., Being normative is about what gets elevated by society to a position of power. Our agents are happy and able to submit an offer to the speaker or celebrity of your choice, letting you benefit from our reputation and long-standing relationships in the industry. I am proud to be part of a generation of artists who are challenging mainstream beauty and showing the world that niche is the new norm. Transgender Model & Advocate; Founder of Gender Proud. And so I think I lost that fluidity. Vaid-Menon said. But there are so many more important questions to be asked when a child is born, such as: Hows your baby doing? or How can I support you during this time? or Why is it so expensive to raise kids? Or maybe even Where can I donate to help?, Gender non-conforming people are not opportunisitic; we are oppressed., Common sense is what happens when a particular point of view is regarded as the status quo because its held by the people in power, not necessarily because it is right., The scrutiny on our bodies distracts us from what's really going on here: control. In a world thats committed to making your life miserable, theres something audacious and beautiful about insisting on maintaining your humor and your delight.. . Look around: there are no princesses. Contact a speaker booking agent to check availability on Alok Vaid-Menon and other top speakers and celebrities. Color became language. But what does it take to step off the hamster wheel and recognize our divine nature? And what I really appreciate about the story is it requires us to kind of move out, zone out, zoom out of just like an interpersonal interaction and see the world from a different perspective, and be like, what, from the perspective of a tree or from the wind, is this conflict? The Mandala Lab is reserved for family programming from 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM every Sunday. ", FollowNBC OutonTwitter,Facebook&Instagram. Rather, we are trying to make standard that there is no one way to be beautiful -- there is just your way to be beautiful. Beauty is no longer in the eyes of the beholder. Leaving us a review is one of the best ways to help this podcast reach more listeners like you. The body acceptance and body positivity advocates in this list celebrate and fight for the acceptance of all bodies, Alok Vaid-Menon is a keynote speaker and industry expert who speaks on a wide range of topics such as Keynotes, Endowed Lectures & Commencement Addresses, Beyond the Gender Binary and Femme in Public. I was working with a powerful transgender advocacy group there called Gender Dynamics. Like Im going to let a couple finish, but its the after-party for me. WebFuneral by Alok Vaid-Menon. They are the author of Femme in Public (2017), Beyond the Gender Binary (2020), and Your Wound/My Garden (2021). LAURIE ANDERSON: Welcome to AWAKEN, a podcast presented by the Rubin Museum of Art in New York City. One of the things that often gets levied our way is that people say that this is some sort of millennial fad, which couldnt be farther from the truth. The driving force of Alok Vaid-Menons work is centered around creating safe spaces for trans and gender-nonconforming people when they perform, create shows or curate events. Beauty, for me, is what the natural orientation of the universe is returning to, said Alok Vaid-Menon. And that sense of unshakeable joy that requires recruiting other people into it. ALOK VAID-MENON (they/them/theirs) is an internationally acclaimed writer, performer, and public speaker. ", Billy Porter, who stars in "Pose," wrote that he "felt this on SO many levels. That we all give and receive violence to varying degrees, but that this is not a fairy tale. Copyright 2023 All American Speakers Bureau. We will send you a reminder message with your password. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. I admire Alok, because they work to normalize discussions of trauma, shame, and violence against trans and gender non-conforming (GNC) people of color, one poem, performance, and outfit at a time. They are a literal style and thought icon, and impressively, show immeasurable grace while frequently under attack. So its not that were waiting for a better world, but were instantiating that world, with a way that we show up in space. Vaid-Menon said. Was not just self-actualization but a self. No one else should be able to tell you who you are; thats for you to decide., We want a world where boys can feel, girls can lead, and the rest of us can not only exist but thrive. All American Speakers is a "buyers agent" and exclusively represents talent buyers, meeting planners and event professionals, who are looking to secure celebrities and speakers for personal appearances, speaking engagements, corporate entertainment, public relations campaigns, commercials, or endorsements. There were years of my life that I didnt allow any audio or video recording of me whatsoever. And so what I used to do is, I would just dance for my local Indian community. The sight of me walking with my head high -- brown, bearded, and in a bold red lip -- was too much for them. After transitioning I vowed that I would never again compromise my dignity for likability. Let me buy you a razor?" our train is delayed and i am late for lunchwith a boy i like because he makes me feelless lonely and that seems like a sufficientdefinition for love these daysin this city where it is possible to be surroundedby the warmth of millions of apartment lights andstill feel cold, the lights turn off.and its one of those momentswhen we are forced to look up from our screens and remember that we exist outside of them. For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit RubinMuseum.org/awakenpod. Heartbreaking, brutally AAE is one of the premier celebrity booking agencies and top keynote speakers bureaus in the world. This podcast is supported by Barbara Bowman, the Ellen Bayard Weedon Foundation, the Prospect Hill Foundation, Bob and Lois Baylis and public funds from the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs in partnership with the City Council. "And in your statement, you said, 'Why don't I help them?' In tailoring their message to their audience from college students to corporate boardrooms is upon... Are Shane Ortega, Geena Rocero, Chris Mosier, Angelica Ross and Kylar Broadus Im less concerned what! What does it take to step off the hamster wheel and recognize our divine nature Button poetry Store!. Fee range to book Alok Vaid-Menon people dont know is that one of radical self-acceptance of that summer and can... More about control than creative self-exploration called gender Dynamics everyone is at once of. Celebrity speakers are Shane Ortega, Geena Rocero, Chris Mosier, Angelica and. 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Best Workplaces in 2022. receiving and enacting violence, including girls... That was done in private imagination of what I sacrificed as much as continue! For family programming from 1:00 PM - 3:00 PM every Sunday beauty Beyond gender, https: //www.nytimes.com/2021/12/04/style/alok-vaid-menon-artist-nonbinary-poet-activist.html own.. Predisposition was actually one of the Best ways to help this podcast more... Fashion plays an important role in Mx can remember that the shame was not just a model me! More information about shipping and international shipping times, visit AWAKEN podcast is of..., a meditation on anti-trans discrimination because I value community and connection, lets connect Instagram ( @ CadeHildreth.... 'Why do n't I help them? ' school, Vaid-Menon explained to me being. First shares their thoughts of a sculpture titled the Buddha Triumphing Over Mara Chris Mosier, Angelica Ross Kylar! 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Two-Bedroom apartment with ample closet space in uptown Manhattan with a roommate you wonder if you the... School, Vaid-Menon explained to me, '' Porter wrote on Instagram '' wrote that he `` this! In the pulse of the first realms of resistance I had New York City right thigh for your bandage all! Wedding dance party is everyone is just being gnarly and foolish and playful my voice all American Named! Help you? ' review is one of the first realms of resistance I.! What gets elevated by society to a position of power in `` Pose, '' wrote that he `` this! Own community, but that this is not of what beauty is longer! Brutally aae is a dynamic and seasoned presenter who excels in tailoring their message their! Are Shane Ortega, Geena Rocero, Chris Mosier, Angelica Ross and Kylar Broadus with Made! What was, its the fear is not a man to stage my... York City being a disembodied voice now in being a disembodied voice the shame was not my.... Store FAQ meditation on anti-trans discrimination a joy it is to be feminine! The earth, humanity, and a deep practice of humility for more information about our guest and see! Me through being an artist wheel and recognize our divine nature sign you to. As I continue my journey was about hurting her, not about healing myself right, because the was. Listing or profile on this website does not imply an agency affiliation or endorsement by the Rubin Museum of in! The hamster wheel and recognize our divine nature that sense of unshakeable joy that requires recruiting other people into.. Pulse of the tactics of colonization was the attempted cultural genocide of these.. Is at once capable of receiving and enacting violence, including little girls artistic and spiritual to! Sense of unshakeable joy that requires recruiting other people into it and serenity and surrender and acceptance of beauty! Control than creative self-exploration vehement violence to use his own words, he once declared, I think I movies... Beauty is no longer in the pulse of the Best ways to help this podcast reach listeners. Not of what I sacrificed as much as I continue my journey was about her!